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The difficultly with compromising ourselves in order to have a ‘some crumbs relationship’ rather than ‘no crumbs at all’, is that when the inevitable happens and we end up unhappy and/or things come to an end, we wonder why we weren’t ‘enough’ and where we went ‘wrong’.

“I was willing to make ends meet with your crumbs and put them through the exaggeration oven and turn them into a loaf while making up the shortfall with my love, devotion and lack of boundaries and you don’t want me?

By the time of this interview, she had already given up and moved on, finally discovering her future husband while visiting old friends at her alma mater. Ryan (RD): What year did you sign up with an online dating website and how long did you keep your account? RD: What were the majority of messages that you received from guys like? I got some commenting on my picture telling me how “hot” I was…how “good” I looked.

Anonymous Woman (AW): I can’t remember the exact year I signed up… Actually, now that I think about it, that was how most of the messages I got started.

I stopped trying to be enough for my parents through my ‘romantic’ partners.

I’ve had to learn through trial and error how to be enough for and the day I stopped doing this is when I felt a weight off.

All of this messing around with ‘scale’ is very confusing and when things don’t work out it hurts and does a number on your ego and your head. and it scares you when you know that you had no business giving them the time of day let alone the steam off your pee. Find another version of them to make the investment worthwhile?

It guts you that everything you’ve tried to be is an identity especially cultivated and formulated . You’ve customised yourself and it’s not like you can return you to the shop and get a new version. Incidentally, that’s how you end up repeating an unhealthy pattern trying to right the wrongs of the past.

That was one of the main reasons I called it quits.If you’re willing to settle for crumbs it means that you’re willing to settle for less than mutual love, care, trust, respect and a relationship with intimacy, commitment, progression, balance and consistency and that’s before you even get near shared values. You don’t sign up or continue to participate in what feels like a permanent audition for someone who it feels like you’re enough.Believe me as someone who went from childhood to adult feeling like I couldn’t please (I should’ve tried harder, got a higher grade, a better gift, looked a certain way, not made mistakes), I know the madness of trying to please the unpleasable stops when you don’t base how you feel about you on others, but more importantly, you don’t subject you to living the life of an inadequate performing seal.It would put them on a pedestal and make for a hugely imbalanced relationship that just isn’t sustainable.This is not what love or an even moderately healthy relationship looks like; Whatever you’re willing to settle for is what you’re going to get.

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